To my Husband on Father’s Day

Before Mother’s Day, we often see posts directed at women who aren’t yet mothers because we realize how difficult that day can be…but what about the guys?

We know that men process their feelings and emotions vastly different than we women do, and after nine years of marriage, a lot of times I’m still left scratching my head as I wonder what in the world my husband is thinking or feeling. I’m screaming or sobbing internally and it may not come out of my mouth or my eyes, but it is all over my face. My husband is not that way. If he’s struggling, the majority of the time, if he doesn’t tell me, I won’t know about it.

As we have been approaching Father’s Day, I’ve been thinking about my husband and all the men out there like him…and I have a few things I’d like to say.

I see you.

I know a lot of times during our crazy, hectic life, some things tend to escape my attention, but I see you.

I see the goofy grin and silly mood you create when you see I’m having a rough day. On the good days and bad, you are my best friend.

I see the worry in your face as I’m sad and upset and you can’t fix it. You offer your shoulder for me to cry on because that is all you can do. When I need you the most, you are my rock.

I see the smile on your face as you play with our nieces and our friend’s kids. I see the patience you exhibit with our nephew. I see how calm you are in the midst of chaos, and I can see beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are going to be an amazing father.

I see your desire to be that dad. I see it in your countenance as we look at baby things. I see it in your eyes as you smile and make faces at kids in restaurants who are mesmerized by your beard. Sometimes it’s faint, but it’s there…and I see it.

I’m sorry that you’re having to spend another Father’s Day without a child to cuddle or to give you a homemade card or wish you “Happy Father’s Day.” We both know I have no more control over that than you do, but still…I’m sorry. I may not be able to change it, but I still feel responsible. I can rest in the fact that our Heavenly Father knows what He is doing and is writing our life story in the way that will make us better and bring the most glory to Himself.

I may not know exactly what you’re thinking and feeling on this holiday, especially as you stand up and preach to the fathers in our church, and that’s okay. I don’t need to know exactly what’s going through your mind, because I know what’s going through mine.

I see all these boys and men who have all these children and either leave them or mistreat them and are never the fathers their children deserve, and I see you who would gladly take these children into your heart and our home….and I fall in love with you all over again. Your heart is so full and so ready to care for a little one, and I can’t wait for the day to come when I can see you in action. You are so kind and patient and fun, and our kids will be so incredibly blessed to have you as their dad.

Know that I am praying for you today. I try my best to pray for you every day and every time you step into the pulpit, but just as you pray more for me on the hard days, I’m praying especially for you today. 

I may not know exactly what you’re feeling, but know that I see you. You aren’t forgotten or lost in the shuffle or overlooked because you’re a man and aren’t supposed to have feelings. 

Someday soon (maybe next year!), we will get to celebrate Father’s Day in the way you deserve, but in the meantime….

I see you, and I love you so much. ❤️

To all the other men out there who fit in this uncomfortable and unasked for category, I see you too…and I’m praying for you today as well.

To all the men who proudly do justice to and wear the title of “Dad,” thank you. We need men like you, and we celebrate you for the priceless gifts you are today.

Happy Father’s Day. 💚

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