What To Do When Fellowship is Gone

Song of Solomon is a book of the Bible that is avoided by many people.
Sure, they may skim over it as they incorporate their yearly “Read Through the Bible” plan, but how often do Christians really sit down and study out the truths found in that book?
They’re there, you know.

I must admit, it wasn’t a book I gave much thought to. I have been in church my whole life and could probably count on both hands the number of messages I’ve heard from Song of Solomon…until a few years ago.
God gave my husband a good bit of insight and several messages from this book, and it blew me away.
To see the relationship between Solomon and this woman he loved so much, his “beloved,” and how that is an example of Christ’s love for the church is just amazing to me.

Take Chapter 5 for example.
It begins with a banquet in the garden. The scene then changes to Solomon outside her door, wanting inside so the fellowship could continue.
But she was already in bed, and didn’t want to get back up.
She was too tired to fellowship anymore.
After standing outside all night, he put his hand in the hole of the door, and seeing that, she got up to let him in…but he was gone.
She had waited too late and he had withdrawn himself.

Doesn’t this sound a little too familiar?
We have a good time of fellowship with the Lord, but when He wants the fellowship to continue, we make excuses.
We give Him our Sundays, but you mean He wants Mondays too?

“God, I don’t have time to pray right now. I have to get this done.”
“Lord, I have to get up early as it is for school, and then there’s all my afternoon activities… I’ll try to make some time for You before bed.”
“God, don’t You hear the baby crying? I need to clean up while he’s napping, then I have to get supper started… I’m sorry, but there’s just no time to spend with You right now!”
“Lord, I’m just exhausted. Maybe tomorrow.”

I realize some of these are legitimate excuses, but so was the excuse Solomon’s bride gave.
Ultimately, our reasons don’t matter.
When He calls us, we need to respond.
It’s essential to maintain that sweet relationship.

Have you ever gotten to the place where everything you needed to do was done and you finally had a little time to spend with God, only to find it seemed to be one-sided?
Your prayers didn’t seem to be making it past the ceiling?
The sweet communion and fellowship you’ve enjoyed before was gone?
God had seemingly withdrawn Himself?

This is where this one who Solomon called his “love,” his “dove,” his “undefiled” found herself.
She was now ready to spend time with him, but he was gone.

Thankfully, she was not content to just shrug, say “Oh well,” and go back to bed.
No.
She was deeply bothered by his absence and she wouldn’t be content and satisfied until that relationship was mended.

She went searching for him.
She ran into the daughters of Jerusalem and she told them if they saw her beloved to tell him she was “sick with love.”
They essentially asked her, “What makes him so special that you HAVE to find him?”
She began to describe him….

“My beloved is white and ruddy, the chiefest among ten thousand.
His head is as the most fine gold, his locks are bushy, and black as a raven.
His eyes are as the eyes of doves by the rivers of waters, washed with milk, and fitly set.
His cheeks are as a bed of spices, as sweet flowers: his lips like lilies, dropping sweet smelling myrrh.
His hands are as gold rings set with the beryl: his belly is as bright ivory overlaid with sapphires.
His legs are as pillars of marble, set upon sockets of fine gold: his countenance is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars.
His mouth is most sweet: yea, he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.”
~Song of Solomon 5:10-16

Although we don’t use many of these expressions still today, one can tell just by reading these words how much she was in love with her king.
In her eyes, he was the best man in the world.

Do you remember when you were first head-over-heels in love?
I do!
All I wanted to talk about was how amazing and how wonderful this man I loved was. To me, he was the best man in the world. There was no one else as good, as kind, as handsome, as loving as he was.
If you asked me for a description, you may have gotten:
“He’s tall with red hair and the manliest, bushiest, most amazing red beard imaginable!! ( 😉 )
He has the most beautiful eyes that make me feel like I’m the only woman in the world. When he looks at me, I can see the love he has for me.
His strong arms make me feel like wrapped in them is the safest place I could possibly be.
I look at him and see my home.
He’s more than I ever dreamed of and all I could possibly want!”

(This is still true today, by the way!)

Now think of Christ.
Can you not relate her description to our Beloved? Our King?
The best description possible still fails to measure up to our wonderful Lord!
When no words seem adequate, we can simply say, “Yea, He is altogether lovely.”

If you read on into chapter 6, you’ll find that she found her beloved in the garden ~ the last place they had fellowship.

At times when it seems the Lord has withdrawn Himself, remind yourself of who He is and what makes Him so special to you.
Retrace your steps and go back to the last place you had communion and sweet fellowship. That’s where you’ll find Him, ready and patiently waiting for your return.
Solomon didn’t hold a grudge and be mad for a while. He welcomed her with open arms and they picked up right where they left off.
Is not our King even more compassionate and loving?
He stands, eagerly anticipating the renewal of fellowship with the one He loves.

Friends, let’s make time for Him.
He wants to speak to us.
He offers the peace and satisfaction that only He can give.
Let’s not waste time with things that ultimately don’t matter.
When He calls, let’s respond.
Is not the time we spend with Him worth whatever small sacrifice we have to make?
Remember who He is!
“Yea, He is altogether lovely. This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend.”

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